Ghost in my house

Well, I haven't had time to smudge and white light room by room like I typically do whenever I've moved into a new house. I did what my mom would call a lick and a promise.

The other morning I was awakened at 5:30 but didn't know what had awakened me. I rolled over beside hubby and suddenly the bathroom door that I close until I hear it catch every night swung open.

I felt the presence of a young girl about nine years old. I didn't say anything because I wanted to see what she was up to since we've been waked up several time by the tv in our bedroom suddenly turning on. The cat jumped off the bed and moved to sit in front of the closet doors looking up as though watching someone. Then he turned and ran from the room and bounded down the stairs as though chasing something or someone.

I sighed and told myself I would have to send the girl on her way later and went back to sleep only to be awakened a few hours later by the TV downstairs in the den blaring. My husband was not in bed, so I assumed he'd decided to watch the morning news a bit louder than norm, so I called down to him, okay I had to yell to be heard above the noise and asked him if he could turn it down a bit, only to have him respond from his office across the hallway, saying he was just about to ask me to do the same thing.

So yesterday I did tell the entity she had to leave because I didn't sense she really needed my help. She was just being mischievous, which my pal, Melissa, verified for me this morning.

Anyway, I guess I spoke too soon about not having any entities in the new house. Hopefully, there won't be anymore passersby. After all these years of dealing with them, I've pretty much put up a do not disturb sign. Maybe I need to make my sign bigger. (g)

House Guest

We have a special house guest this week. Lisa is a very sweet young lady who has Downs Syndrome.

Lisa’s mom, a friend and coworker, went on her honeymoon this week. At the last minute, the plans she had set up for her daughter’s care went awry so we stepped in and invited Lisa to stay with us this week so her mom wouldn’t have to cancel her special vacation. Lots of times our kids’ friends stay over for several days, so I figured, why not now?

So we’ve been trying to show Lisa a good time, plus we’re a pretty busy and fun family anyway. Saturday we went to see a movie Lisa and my younger daughter Stephi wanted to see. Yesterday, we went with a friend and her family to see the Japanese gardens and museum up in Palm Beach, and then we picnicked (spelling?). After all that, we went to Barnes & Nobles so I could write while the girls read anime and teen magazines.

The reason for this post?

I was disappointed in a lot of people around us.

It’s quite obvious that Lisa has Downs Syndrome and that she is disabled. She walks very slowly and carefully. In fact, we had to borrow a wheel chair for her at the gardens as she ran out of energy to complete the walk.

Everywhere we went, people just pushed ahead of Lisa. Instead of holding the door for Lisa, several people just kept piling through while Lisa was holding the door open. At the gardens, there was one Japanese house where we had to take off our shoes and wear their paper slippers. They had only a few chairs to facilitate this procedure. On our way out, when I needed to help Lisa put her shoes back on, adults just stayed in the chairs long after they had their shoes on. They didn’t get up so Lisa could sit while I put on her shoes. And by then, Lisa was flushed and obviously exhausted. Even if not, her balance is obviously not good and she obviously needs to sit down to put on her shoes.

How can people – stable-minded adults – be so insensitive and unkind? Not everyone mind you. But I was amazed how many.

Lisa is such a sweetheart. She has so much love. She glows. She has the sweetest smile and she’s a very well-behaved girl. I say “girl” but she’s really in her 30’s. However, she’s much less mature than my 15 year old daughter and in some ways, less mature than my 11 year old son.

I have a hearing disability and I often get upset, or at sometimes merely annoyed, that people don’t believe that I am hard of hearing, or are insensitive. Recently I told a friend, I almost wished people could see my disability and thus would believe it was real and that I’m not faking it or being rude. But you know what? After this, I’m not sure that seeing is believing – or caring.

I apologize to all the kind and loving and sensitive and caring people out there. And maybe some of the people were just in a daze or faced challenges themselves that appeared to so cavalierly breeze by Lisa.
It’s just my hope that people on the whole will start being kinder and care more for our challenged, less abled neighbors.

weight management

I’ve been struggling with weight maintenance for several years now. Three to four years ago, I had a major victory and lost 95 pounds using Weight Watchers and lots of exercising (mainly walking).

I was on top of the world. I thought I had this licked. I loved being a size 6. I got cocky.

Now, I’ve regained almost 25 pounds and a couple sizes. To be sure, I don’t look or feel nearly as bad as I did before losing all that massive weight. But I don’t feel or look as good as I did 25 or 15 pounds ago, either. And I’m really scared I’ll gain more and look, and especially, feel worse. That I’ll be a candidate for diabetes, etc. like my hubby and so many of my friends. My hypo-thyroid disorder and hearing loss is bad enough.

Daily it seems I’m faced with special occasions or too-tempting invitations to lunch, dinner, or the movies (can I resist nachos with double cheese? Think again!). There are parties at work for anything and everything and even when I avoid them, I’ll return to my desk to find a piece of cake and ice cream sitting there.

My walking has pretty much been curtailed. I still walk during breaks at work or during my daughter’s softball practices. However, we put my son into karate (for discipline reasons) and that’s six days a week (except when there’s a softball game or other special event and we have to skip karate). My grandson who lives with us also takes karate. And the girls and I started going to adult karate class after their classes. So by the time we’re out of karate, it’s late and we’re tired and it’s usually dark. Bye bye nightly walking.

I’d hoped that karate would be just as good if not better exercise. But I’m gaining weight. Of course, I’m so exhausted, so hungry by the time I finish all this, I practically attack the fastest food available. Usually fast food. Sometimes Subway which isn’t bad, but I can’t afford that all the time. I keep thinking, I’ll be bad (with eating) just this one night and I’ll be less tired, more able to cope with it “tomorrow night”. Then the vicious cycle resumes the next night.

Plus I always feel hungry. What gives with that? It must be stress or emotion. During the day, despite the parties, I’m pretty good at work. I bring my carrots or radishes to munch on. I keep bananas and apples and gum and weight watchers candy available. I bring WW lunches or vegetable soup or spinach for lunch. Of course, I’m getting sick of WW lunches and spinach and if my lunch gang says let’s go for pizza or order in Chinese, I lose it, and I’m right in the middle of the feeding frenzy, ditching my low calorie food.

The hunger is in my throat. Overwhelming, excruciating hunger. I hate it. According to articles on the web, this is emotional, not physiological. Even knowing that, it’s extremely hard to ignore, especially at night when I’m completely exhausted but starved. Right now, I’m on my second piece of sugar-free gum today so I’m trying to be good. By the time my stomach growls, then the “hunger” in my throat usually disappears and I can ignore the other for awhile with hardly a problem. How weird is that? How weird am I?

I have to, have to, have to, lose those 25 pounds, or at least 15 (lots of my friends said I looked too thin 25 or even 20 pounds ago, so we’ll see). And this time, I HAVE to keep it off. I love the karate and my goal is to make black belt to the nth degree and stay in the program. But I have to get a handle on this eating and the exhaustion.

Glamour Shots and Mary Kay

I finally had a recent photograph taken. Not just a snapshot on our digital cam, but a professional picture. Not just any professional picture, but my author photo (I hope), by Glamour Shots, complete with the bling and feather boas.

My friend whose a Mary Kay consultant prettied me up with a glam nighttime look (which I love, btw, - I’m getting the colors which I hope to use for some romance writing conferences someday), and they draped me with hot pink feathers and a black velvet cape and long pink earrings. I hope it turns out well.

I always said I’d never get the glamour shots – so cliché for the authors – but when this opportunity came by through Mary Kay, I couldn’t resist. It was a lot of fun hanging out with the girls and getting made up. (Of course, my girls accuse me of being a girly girl – wearing lots of pink, lots of dresses, high heels, make-up, jewelry – refreshing my lipstick at the ballgame Friday night – guilty as charged).

Trust me, this Mary Kay stuff is awesome. My rep is awesome (I have to say that in case she googles me again – sounds so dirty . Or because the next time we spar, she doesn’t whoop my butt too bad – for she can. She’s several belts beyond me in taekwondo.). Honestly, she’s awesome. I tried a bit of the product many many many (many many many many MANY moons ago) and I didn’t think I liked it. I finally tried it again at her party a couple months ago. At that time my skin was drying out and flaking bigtime (and I used to have way oily skin). The skin care stuff really worked/works. I love it. No more flaking and cracking. People at work have been complimenting me. One lady said “you glow”. This particular co-worker thought it was because I’d found my perfect weight (I lost about 95 pounds 3 years ago, regained 20 – a lot of my friends thought I’d lost too much and thought I looked too thin for awhile). I’m sure it’s a combination of the my make-over in general – the weight, the new hairstyle, the skin care, the great new colors.

I hope my friend doesn’t mind, but here’s some free promo. Go to her website to play with the virtual make-overs. It’s fun – well, my goth girls might not think so, but I do. Oh! And you can even order the product online. Here’s where to go: http://www.marykay.com/mmtorres (And no, I’m not getting a kick-back or anything – maybe some good karma for passing along a good thing – although if you’re trying to get good karma, does that act in reverse? Okay – I’m overthinking again.)

Getting back to the pics. I’ll post one or two on my website at www.ashleyladd.com after I get them back – should be next Monday night. But to be balanced, I’ll also post some of me in my karate uniform – with my new awesome yellow belt and new uniform.

See? I’m not a complete girly girl. I’m ex-Air Force and I still wear combat boots – sometimes pink to be truthful, but still boots.

Rant - bad service - anyone else?

I’m on a rant. Is it just some cosmic force that hates me, or is customer service really degenerating? At least at fast food restaurants? For the past month, almost every time I order food at McDonald’s or Wendy’s (especially Wendy’s) they screw up the order. I tried the new ham and swiss Frescata sandwich at Wendy’s and loved it. I wanted it again. So the next time when I ordered it plus a large order for my family, the entire order was screwed up. I was given the wrong Frescata sandwich. I asked for no tomato on my sandwich. The only part of my order they got right was that they left the tomato off my sandwich. But I only specified no tomato for my sandwich. Two of my children wanted tomato on their sandwiches and they did not put tomatoes on their sandwiches. Nor did they put sauce on their sandwiches - they just got dry chicken sandwiches. They did not give us the requested barbecue sauce for my other children's chicken nuggets. Worst of all, when we called back to the manager, she was very rude and told my husband it was our fault the order was messed up. Excuse me? So a couple nights ago I went to a different Wendy's and they also messed up the order. Again I ordered a ham and swiss Frescata with NO tomato and a large diet coke. The young man who took the order seemed confused so I repeated the part about the diet coke at least 3 times and the part about NO tomato twice. He gave me a turkey and swiss sandwich with a tomato. Yuck! And he did not give me a diet coke. When I requested my diet coke, he told me I didn't order it. At least the manager was nicer this time and gave me my diet coke. But I really wanted my ham sandwich and I didn't realize till I bit into it that it was turkey so I suffered through it. But why should I bother to order anything from Wendy's if I dont' get what I order? McDonald’s is a little better, but still messes up something usually when I order. Lately I’ve been ordering a toasted bagel and cream cheese with a large diet coke for breakfast. More than once, they don’t give me the cream cheese. They repeat and even print it on the screen. Since I didn’t see the cream cheese on the screen, I asked for it again. They still didn’t get it. When I got to the window I told them the amount was too small so I was pretty sure they still didn’t get the cream cheese. The money taker at the window seemed annoyed and said she’d put in the order. But when I got to the food window, they didn’t give it to me. When I told them it was missing, I got a snotty answer that I didn’t order or pay for it. I told her I asked for it at least 3 times. Then this morning, they gave me the bagel and cream cheese but a medium coke instead of a large. I am so SICK of getting the wrong order, especially when I’ve repeated the correct one several times. These are young people so I doubt they have hearing problems yet. I can understand the occasional mistake and live with it. I can really live with it if they fix it nicely when I tell them. But when it’s almost every time and especially when I get snotty answers, then I get hot. Am I the only one experiencing this? Am I the only one this is bothering. Oh! I tried to find an email to Wendy’s for customer service to tell them – I’ve surfed all over and can’t find one. I only found an email for their investors so I shot off an email there and asked them to forward it to their headquarter’s customer service. I doubt they do, but I can hope. I’ll probably send a snail mail, too. I didn’t complain to McDonald’s as their infractions aren’t as bad as Wendy’s and I hope it doesn’t become so.
Guess I shouldn’t eat out so much? This is curing me. I needed to get back to a healthier diet anyway.

Ashley Ladd
www.ashleyladd.com

Manic Monday

Have you ever had a bad Monday? Oxymoron, right? Monday and bad?

Usually, I don't mind Mondays. I enjoy my job and my coworkers are my friends.

But today is JINXED!

First, I realized I forgot my cell phone in the house, so I went back for that.

Then I forgot my sunglasses, so I went back for them.

Then I realized I forgot the salad dressing for my salad, so you got it. I went back again.

By that time, the garbage pick-up truck almost blocked me in but I managed to escape the driveway before being stalled again - so that was one good thing.

When I got to work, I dropped my large soda on the floor and was on my hands and knees cleaning it up for a good 15 minutes.

Then my husband called me to remind me that our youngest son has a very important doctor's appointment this afternoon - and I spaced out and let him spend the night at a friend's house and to go off to who knows where. Luckily, we tracked them down so he'll be back in time to go to his appointment. But not before my dear old hubby yelled at me - like he didn't know the date also and didn't say anything? He set up the appointment, not me.

I dread the rest of this very unlucky day.

I hope your day is better.

Ashley

Wonderful Sally! What a cool title and especially what a great book.

My fantasy romantica/rubenesque book came out recently at Ellora's Cave, too. It's called "Make-Believe Lover". In it, Becca and her cat Gizmo are zapped into the world of Becca's favorite cartoon. Unfortunately, now Gizmo can talk and won't shut up. Her fantasy hero, Lobo, does not fall immediately head-over-heels in love with her, the evil king wants to invade her world, and his evil dragon thinks they'd make a great lunch.

Make-Believe Lover has garnered all 4 and 5 star reviews and Gizmo is a very popular little kitty. I shudder to think what my cats would say if they could suddenly talk.

It's available at: www.ellorascave.com

I'll be starting the sequel soon.

Ashley
www.ashleyladd.com

To Kiss a Gargoyle

JUST RELEASED.

A book of firsts - My first menage scene, my first E-rotic rating and my first quickie.

I hope you enjoy.

Read an Excerpt

I hope you enjoy!
Sally;)